Overt vs Covert Narcissists

Narcissists are known for their manipulative and deceitful behaviour. They often present a false image of themselves to others in order to gain admiration and approval. When someone begins to uncover the truth about a narcissist's real personality, they may react with anger and aggression. 

Not all narcissism looks the same, and understanding the difference between covert and overt narcissistic personality expression is crucial; especially in relationships where emotional harm can be subtle or confusing.

Overt narcissism is what most people typically recognize: it shows up as arrogance, a constant need for admiration, grandiosity, and a tendency to belittle others openly. These individuals often dominate conversations, seek the spotlight, and react with rage when criticized. 

Covert narcissism, on the other hand, is much harder to detect. Covert narcissists may appear quiet, introverted, or even self-sacrificing, but underneath, they also carry a deep need for validation and a fragile sense of self. Instead of demanding attention, they may seek it through guilt-tripping, playing the victim, passive-aggressive behavior, or chronic resentment. 

While overt narcissists want to be seen as superior, covert narcissists often want to be seen as misunderstood or morally superior. 

Both types can cause emotional confusion and damage in close relationships, but the covert type often leaves people second-guessing themselves because the manipulation is more subtle.

For a narcissist, being exposed can be a devastating blow to their fragile ego. They rely on the admiration and validation of others to feel good about themselves, so when their true nature is revealed, they may feel a sense of shame and humiliation. This can lead to feelings of inadequacy and insecurity, prompting them to lash out at the person responsible for uncovering the truth.

In many cases, a narcissist will attempt to discredit the individual who has discovered the truth about them, gaslighting them and attempting to manipulate the situation in their favour. They may become defensive and deny any wrongdoing, trying to turn the tables and blame the other person for causing the conflict.

Overall, a narcissist's reaction to being exposed for who they truly are is often one of anger and hostility.

They may view the truth-teller as a threat to their carefully constructed façade and will stop at nothing to protect their self-image, even at the expense of others.